EmoshuNewsletter - Monday, April 16, 2007
emoshuns.com provides emotional healthcare services in Manhattan, Brooklyn,and Long Island, as well as by telephone and e-mail nationwide. See our web
site or call us for more information.
Hi Everyone!
I hope this edition of our EmoshuNewsletter finds you well!
Occasionally, counseling issues I address with my clients parallel issues I'm experiencing in my own life. When this happens I make every effort to
examine and address the situation so I can continue my personal growth and continue to provide the best for those in my care.
Some of the tools I use to examine (and hopefully "fix") these things include speaking with my own emotional healthcare counselor, discussing it with my healthy friends, kicking it around with Olga, and sharing it with you in the EmoshuNews Letter so you can offer your thoughts through the emoshuns.com contact page.
So here's the situation....
Several of my client's and I are struggling to "slow down". We find ourselves moving a thousand miles an hour in an effort to "catch up". We work long hours, fill our plates with things to do, "multi-task", and look to always add "more".
And when we're asked why we're moving so fast, we answer:
"I wasted so much time already"
"I only have so much time left to become successful"
"I want to be able to retire with x amount of money in my 401k"
And so on, and so on.......
And in this fear-based process we find ourselves having to sacrifice things we "would love to do", in order to accomplish things "we have to do". We find ourselves struggling with stress, depression, and anger, instead of experiencing the joys of life. We end up destroying our relationships with our loved ones and our friends instead of experiencing the ecstasy of love. We find ourselves bewildered, lost and alone, instead of sharing our lives with others.
And ultimately we find ourselves sad and miserable instead of happy, contented, and in peace.
So in this edition of the newsletter I offer what was offered to me by several of those in my inner circle:
From my friend Dr. Steve..."there is a law of diminishing returns Frank. If you try and accomplish too much, you'll end up accomplishing nothing".
From my friend Rob the Jeweler..."slow down and enjoy the ride. You're only here once"
And, what I think was the best advice of all, came from my girl Olga...
"Don't try to catch up, try and catch on"
And so if you find yourself in this situation, speak with your inner circle. Speak with your emotional healthcare counselor, kick it around with you loved ones, and think about the advice I got from my team.
And if you have been in this situation before but have found a way to address it, share it with us through the contact page.
Until next time....stay well and enjoy the ride!
Frank
E-Mail: info@emoshuns.com
Web Site: www.emoshuns.com
Toll-Free: 888-WANNA TALK
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Monday, April 16, 2007
Thursday, March 15, 2007
"Sharing" - Volume II Issue 8
EmoshuNews – Friday, March 15, 2007
Emoshuns.com provides services and resources to help families and individuals “Feel Better, Look Better, Take Back Your Life!”
Hello Everyone,
I was browsing on-line and came across a SAMHSA web page asking for personal stories of those who are recovering from emotional healthcare problems and realized how rewarding that could be.
Emotionally rewarding and hope-producing for those currently experiencing problems, and rewarding for those of us recovering from an emotional health problem who get to share our recovery with others.
After all…”you can only keep what you have by giving it away!”
So what I’m doing this issue is inviting you to share your story of recovery and hope and I’ll publish it in a future issue of the EmoshuNews letter (maybe even the next issue!).
Make it as long or as short as you want. I’ll either edit it to fit or I’ll run it as is. Other than that there are no guidelines.
It’s all about you!
So start writing!! And when you’re done, send it to me either through the convenient contact page or by email at Frank@emoshuns.com.
Til next time,
Frank
E-Mail: editor@emoshuns.com - Toll-Free: (800) 983-3050 - Web: www.emoshuns.com
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Tell your family and friends about EmoshuNews!
To subscribe, send a blank message to: news-subscribe@emoshuns.com
To unsubscribe, send a blank e-mail address to: news-unsubscribe@emoshuns.com
Emoshuns.com provides services and resources to help families and individuals “Feel Better, Look Better, Take Back Your Life!”
Hello Everyone,
I was browsing on-line and came across a SAMHSA web page asking for personal stories of those who are recovering from emotional healthcare problems and realized how rewarding that could be.
Emotionally rewarding and hope-producing for those currently experiencing problems, and rewarding for those of us recovering from an emotional health problem who get to share our recovery with others.
After all…”you can only keep what you have by giving it away!”
So what I’m doing this issue is inviting you to share your story of recovery and hope and I’ll publish it in a future issue of the EmoshuNews letter (maybe even the next issue!).
Make it as long or as short as you want. I’ll either edit it to fit or I’ll run it as is. Other than that there are no guidelines.
It’s all about you!
So start writing!! And when you’re done, send it to me either through the convenient contact page or by email at Frank@emoshuns.com.
Til next time,
Frank
E-Mail: editor@emoshuns.com - Toll-Free: (800) 983-3050 - Web: www.emoshuns.com
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Tell your family and friends about EmoshuNews!
To subscribe, send a blank message to: news-subscribe@emoshuns.com
To unsubscribe, send a blank e-mail address to: news-unsubscribe@emoshuns.com
Monday, March 5, 2007
"Understand" - Volume II Issue 7
EmoshuNewsletter - Monday, March 5, 2007
emoshuns.com provides emotional healthcare services in Manhattan, Brooklyn, and Long Island, as well as by telephone and e-mail nationwide. See our web
site or call us for more information.
Hi Everyone!
I hope this edition of our EmoshuNewsletter finds you well!
At the worst point in my life I had written a "good bye" note. In it I explained that the reason I was "leaving" was because I felt no one truly understood me. I felt as though no one cared about me or even bothered to listen to what I was trying to say. I felt frustrated, abandoned, isolated, completely and utterly alone and left with no alternative but to end it all.
But somehow I didn't "leave" and thankfully ended up in an emotional healthcare setting instead. And while in treatment I was taught the single most important lesson in my life:
"Understand Rather Than Be Understood"
At first I struggled understanding this concept. I felt confused trying to figure out how I could possibly understand others if I didn't understand myself. I felt angry at the idea that it was somehow my responsibility to give others what they wouldn't give me. I felt scared at the thought of understanding that others truly didn't care. And I felt lost because I was sure I could never understand anything.
But I was told by my counselors that life was not perfection...it was practice.
So I began to practice at trying to understand and practiced not trying to be understood. And lo and behold my life began to be transformed! I learned to listen closely to what people were saying. I worked hard at listening because listening is hard. I worked hard at clarifying what people told me. I worked hard at understanding not only what people said but also what people meant. I worked hard at helping people communicate with me and offered them an ear and made it clear that I cared what they had to say and understood how they were feeling.
In this process magic happened. Not only was I able to develop an understanding of others, I was able to begin to develop a deeper understanding of myself. And this outsight into others and insight into myself have been the most rewarding gifts I have ever received.
And finally, I received another gift in this process no less valuable. People began to understand me! And they did so because they trusted me. They trusted me because I gave them what they needed. Understanding! And because I understood, they began to seek me out. They felt trust in me because I truly cared and in turn they listened carefully to what I had to say. And through this interaction we both received what we needed.
So in this issue of the EmoshuNewsletter I offer this advice to you:
"Understand Rather Than Be Understood"
Until next time....
Frank
E-Mail: info@emoshuns.com
Web Site: www.emoshuns.com
Toll-Free: 888-WANNA TALK
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Tell your family and friends about EmoshuNews!
To subscribe
Send a blank message to: news-subscribe@emoshuns.com
To unsubscribe
Send a blank e-mail address to: news-unsubscribe@emoshuns.com
emoshuns.com provides emotional healthcare services in Manhattan, Brooklyn, and Long Island, as well as by telephone and e-mail nationwide. See our web
site or call us for more information.
Hi Everyone!
I hope this edition of our EmoshuNewsletter finds you well!
At the worst point in my life I had written a "good bye" note. In it I explained that the reason I was "leaving" was because I felt no one truly understood me. I felt as though no one cared about me or even bothered to listen to what I was trying to say. I felt frustrated, abandoned, isolated, completely and utterly alone and left with no alternative but to end it all.
But somehow I didn't "leave" and thankfully ended up in an emotional healthcare setting instead. And while in treatment I was taught the single most important lesson in my life:
"Understand Rather Than Be Understood"
At first I struggled understanding this concept. I felt confused trying to figure out how I could possibly understand others if I didn't understand myself. I felt angry at the idea that it was somehow my responsibility to give others what they wouldn't give me. I felt scared at the thought of understanding that others truly didn't care. And I felt lost because I was sure I could never understand anything.
But I was told by my counselors that life was not perfection...it was practice.
So I began to practice at trying to understand and practiced not trying to be understood. And lo and behold my life began to be transformed! I learned to listen closely to what people were saying. I worked hard at listening because listening is hard. I worked hard at clarifying what people told me. I worked hard at understanding not only what people said but also what people meant. I worked hard at helping people communicate with me and offered them an ear and made it clear that I cared what they had to say and understood how they were feeling.
In this process magic happened. Not only was I able to develop an understanding of others, I was able to begin to develop a deeper understanding of myself. And this outsight into others and insight into myself have been the most rewarding gifts I have ever received.
And finally, I received another gift in this process no less valuable. People began to understand me! And they did so because they trusted me. They trusted me because I gave them what they needed. Understanding! And because I understood, they began to seek me out. They felt trust in me because I truly cared and in turn they listened carefully to what I had to say. And through this interaction we both received what we needed.
So in this issue of the EmoshuNewsletter I offer this advice to you:
"Understand Rather Than Be Understood"
Until next time....
Frank
E-Mail: info@emoshuns.com
Web Site: www.emoshuns.com
Toll-Free: 888-WANNA TALK
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Tell your family and friends about EmoshuNews!
To subscribe
Send a blank message to: news-subscribe@emoshuns.com
To unsubscribe
Send a blank e-mail address to: news-unsubscribe@emoshuns.com
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Men & Depression: Volume II Issue 6
Hi Everyone!
I hope this edition of our EmoshuNewsletter finds you well!
I read a front-page article titled Men and Depression: Facing Darkness in Newsweek’s February 26th edition and I became very excited. Some of the points Julie Scelfo makes in her story is almost exactly the points I’m trying to get across with emoshuns.com.
For instance, to paraphrase Ms. Scelfo:
“Six million American men will be diagnosed with depression this year but millions more suffer silently unaware or unwilling to seek treatment…because men are reluctant to own up to mental illness. Instead of talking about their feelings, men may mask them with alcohol and/or drug abuse, gambling, anger, or workaholism. Men often view asking for help as an admission of weakness”
The very idea that men have to suffer with emotional healthcare issues because of embarrassment or shame or stigma drives me crazy. It’s ridicules, unnecessary, and can be painful, debilitating, and costly and, as Ms. Scelfo points out, deadly:
“The result of this hidden epidemic of is destroyed marriages, disrupted careers, and a cost of billions in lost productivity. The strong silent type model of manhood is so deeply embedded in American men that many would rather kill themselves than seek help.”
Let me repeat that last sentence:
Men Would Rather Kill Themselves Than Seek Help!
My team and I would like to enlist your assistance in changing the way American men (and woman) feel about becoming and staying emotionally healthy. What we’re trying to do is create a paradigm shift in thinking and get people to understand that there is no shame in talking to a professional when you have an emotional health issue.
When my father was a kid no one would regularly see a physician. Today, because we understand the benefits of a regular check-up, we not only take care of our physical health we arm ourselves with knowledge so we can be informed when we visit our doctor.
When I was a kid no one, except “muscle heads” went to the gym. But today, everyone goes to the gym because we’ve discovered the benefits of regular cardio and weight training exercise.
Now, we have to get the word out that emotional healthcare is just as important and speaking to a professional will result in benefits in all areas of your life that are beyond your wildest dreams. Benefits that will impact your emotional health, physical health, relationships, career, education, and self-esteem, and benefits that will result in a happier life.
Always remember and spread the word…..
“Feel Better, Look Better, Take Back Your Life!”
Until next time….
Frank
Thursday, February 8, 2007
Grief and Loss: Newsletter Volume II Issue 5
Hello Everyone,
I was deeply saddened this week when I received news that a close friend of mine lost his father in a tragic accident in
Throughout the afternoon people in attendance, both family and friends took turns saying a few words about this man in a showing of respect, and consideration for those present and those no longer here.
What affected me most deeply was my friend’s simple yet elegant message to those in attendance….
“Let the depth of your emotions, strengthen your resolve”
So in returning to my office I thought I’d examine this thought and reflect on the meaning it has for me.
Since I was very young I have always had a depth of emotion. As a child, and even today as an adult, I cried and cry easily, laughed and laugh from my belly, felt and feel anger to the point of rage, and loved and love wholeheartedly and with complete and reckless abandon. And because of this characteristic, my life has been affected in countless ways.
My angst has brought me to the point of despair, my humor has brought me great joy and, when not in check, great pain, my anger has brought me to places so terrible most people haven’t even had nightmares about, and my love has brought me ecstasy.
So today I felt great sadness. Sadness for a man whose life was cut short, sadness for the loved ones left behind, sadness for my friend for his loss, and sadness for myself in the remembrances of those close to me who have passed.
But in this depth of emotion I find my own resolve. Resolve to continue to live, resolve to continue to teach and to learn, resolve to continue to nurture those in need, and resolve to live to the fullest in the all too short time allotted.
All of us face grief and loss in our lives at one time or another. And it is during that time we have a choice. We can become bitter and angry, isolated and alone, and tearful and disappointed. Or we can be gracious and understanding, supportive and passionate, loving and giving, and, as my friend so eloquently stated…
“Let the depth of your emotions, strengthen your resolve”
Til next time,
E-Mail: editor@emoshuns.com - Toll-Free: (800) 983-3050 - Web: www.emoshuns.com
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Tell your family and friends about EmoshuNews!
To subscribe, send a blank message to: news-subscribe@emoshuns.com
Friday, January 26, 2007
Emotional Health and Heart Attacks: Volume II Issue 4
Emotional Health and Heart Attacks
Greetings,
According to Forbes.com, an article in the January issue of the Mayo Clinic Women's HealthSource reports, "Depression, fear and anger are common reactions after a person has had a heart attack, and emotional recovery is vital to a patient's health and well-being." The article says, "heart attack survivors with depression are three times more likely to die of a future heart attack or other heart problems."
Experts offer several suggestions to aid emotional recovery: 1) Discuss your feelings with doctors, family, and friends; 2) If you think you may be depressed, seek treatment; and, 3) Exercise, as directed by your doctor. Exercise may help relieve anxiety and depression.
These suggestions should not be limited to heart attack survivors. We all deal with emotional challenges at various times in our life. When we're experiencing emotional challenges, it is particularly important that we share our feelings with trusted loved ones, seek support and assistance from experienced professionals (such as our team here at emoshuns.com), and take good care of our physical health by eating well and getting enough rest and exercise.
The American Academy of Family Physicians offers additional advice:
At emoshuns.com, we listen very carefully to our clients. In response, we provide services and tools to help people overcome the emotional challenges - both ordinary and extraordinary - of everyday life. In addition to private consultation in our offices in Manhattan, Brooklyn, and Long Island, we also provide emotional healthcare services nationwide by telephone and e-mail.
Wanna talk? Call now (see our number below), or visit our web site for more information.
Til next time,
Founder/Director
emoshuns.com
E-Mail: editor@emoshuns.com - Toll-Free: (800) 983-3050 - Web Site: www.emoshuns.com
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Emoshuns.com - "Feel Better, Look Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Sunday, January 21, 2007
Childhood Stress: Volume II Issue 3
Emoshuns.com provides emotional healthcare services in Manhattan, Brooklyn, and Long Island, as well as by telephone and e-mail nationwide. See our web site http://www.emoshuns.com or call us for more information.
Hello Everyone!
I read this recent article on-line today. It was published in the California based Bay City News .
To paraphrase: "A new survey suggests Bay Area parents are concerned about their children's emotional health above other potential worries such as weight, leisure activities or exposure to drugs or alcohol.
Interviews with almost 1,800 parents of children up to age 17 in six Bay Area counties showed that almost three-quarters of parents interviewed rated their children's physical health as excellent, and just over half of the parents said the same of their emotional health.
Childhood and adolescent stress was the major concern for parents.
I'm not surprised. I see it everyday in my office. Children and teens in the New York area are also struggling with the stresses of childhood and adolescence. Stress caused by schoolwork, personal and sexual identity, maturation, bullies, future career, everyday choices and decisions, separation and individuation, and so on and so on.
So what's a parent to do?
The answer is simple but the stigma is crippling.
The Answer - Seek counsel with of an emotional healthcare specialist with child and/or adolescent expertise who your son or daughter can speak with. With the right person in their corner, an expert who can develop a therapeutic relationship with your child, the stress can be lessened or alleviated.
The Stigma - Just because a loved one sees a counselor doesn't mean he or she is "sick". It simply means you care enough to make sure they receive all the benefits available to them.
People, including parents and children, often separate physical health from emotional health. But you can't separate the two. If you have a broken leg you're going to be miserable. And both your broken leg and your misery should be treated.
If your child or teen is stressed, help them. If it's because of too much homework, get a tutor, if it's because of a bully, call the police, if it's because of a career choice, help them explore their possibilities, but no matter what, get some help. There are experts out there who are available.
Find one today.
Until next time....
Frank
E-Mail: info@emoshuns.com Web Site: www.emoshuns.com
Toll-Free: 888-WANNA TALK
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Tell your family and friends about EmoshuNews!To subscribeSend a blank message to: news-subscribe@emoshuns.comTo unsubscribeSend a blank e-mail address to: news-unsubscribe@emoshuns.com
Hello Everyone!
I read this recent article on-line today. It was published in the California based Bay City News .
To paraphrase: "A new survey suggests Bay Area parents are concerned about their children's emotional health above other potential worries such as weight, leisure activities or exposure to drugs or alcohol.
Interviews with almost 1,800 parents of children up to age 17 in six Bay Area counties showed that almost three-quarters of parents interviewed rated their children's physical health as excellent, and just over half of the parents said the same of their emotional health.
Childhood and adolescent stress was the major concern for parents.
I'm not surprised. I see it everyday in my office. Children and teens in the New York area are also struggling with the stresses of childhood and adolescence. Stress caused by schoolwork, personal and sexual identity, maturation, bullies, future career, everyday choices and decisions, separation and individuation, and so on and so on.
So what's a parent to do?
The answer is simple but the stigma is crippling.
The Answer - Seek counsel with of an emotional healthcare specialist with child and/or adolescent expertise who your son or daughter can speak with. With the right person in their corner, an expert who can develop a therapeutic relationship with your child, the stress can be lessened or alleviated.
The Stigma - Just because a loved one sees a counselor doesn't mean he or she is "sick". It simply means you care enough to make sure they receive all the benefits available to them.
People, including parents and children, often separate physical health from emotional health. But you can't separate the two. If you have a broken leg you're going to be miserable. And both your broken leg and your misery should be treated.
If your child or teen is stressed, help them. If it's because of too much homework, get a tutor, if it's because of a bully, call the police, if it's because of a career choice, help them explore their possibilities, but no matter what, get some help. There are experts out there who are available.
Find one today.
Until next time....
Frank
E-Mail: info@emoshuns.com Web Site: www.emoshuns.com
Toll-Free: 888-WANNA TALK
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Tell your family and friends about EmoshuNews!To subscribeSend a blank message to: news-subscribe@emoshuns.comTo unsubscribeSend a blank e-mail address to: news-unsubscribe@emoshuns.com
Sunday, January 14, 2007
"Tang of Cilantro" Newsletter: Volume II Issue 2
Hello Everyone!
I was sitting around this afternoon trying to get my thoughts together and decide on a topic for this issue of the EmoshuNewsletter when I glanced up and saw Olga, my girl and my best friend, sitting at the kitchen table having lunch. She was beaming from ear-to-ear and was obviously enjoying whatever it was she was eating. When I saw the smile on her face it warmed my heart and suddenly today's topic appeared. Joy! And both Olga and I are filled with it! She for the simple wonderful things in life, and me because of her.
Last night we went out to New Jersey to play 5-cent poker with some friends. Because Olga could never visit empty-handed she whipped together a simple, elegant, Pico de Gallo (translation: beak of rooster). It's a simple salsa Olga makes with tomatoes, garlic, cilantro, onion and olive oil. And what a hit it makes! And as I expected last night, the card players loved it.
So this afternoon Olga whipped up a batch for lunch. She made a cracker spread from the salsa and some tuna and presto, instant Joy.
For far too long I missed out on the feeling of Joy but not anymore. Today, thanks to Olga being in my life I have come to understand and appreciate the simple things life has to offer. The sweetness of a tomato, the tang of cilantro, the crunch of a cracker, and the depth of love.
Thanks Baby,
Frank
Until next time....
E-Mail: info@emoshuns.com
Web Site: www.emoshuns.com
Toll-Free: 888-WANNA TALK
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
Tell your family and friends about EmoshuNews!
To subscribe
Send a blank message to: news-subscribe@emoshuns.com
To unsubscribe
Send a blank e-mail address to: news-unsubscribe@emoshuns.com
Tuesday, January 2, 2007
"Resolutions Defined" Newsletter: Volume II Issue 1
Happy New Year Everyone,
The New Year often brings with it “resolutions”. Before I made my resolutions for 2007 I thought I’d:
- research exactly what a resolution is;
- review prior resolutions;
- review successes or failures;
- think carefully about new ones for this year; and
- put a plan of action together so this years promises to myself would be kept.
Here’s the result of my contemplations.
A. From www.dictionary.com:
RESOLVE
to come to a definite or earnest decision about; determine (to do something)
RESOLUTION
the act of resolving or determining upon an action or course of action, method, and procedure
- In my younger days my resolutions were repetitive. Stop drinking, stop drugging, quit smoking, lose weight, make more money, and get healthier physically and emotionally. All of these were admirable and doable but all of them took many, many years of trying before….
- In the late 80s it “worked”. I entered treatment for my emotional health and everything else fell into place. I stopped drinking and drugging, I began to feel less anxious and depressed, I stopped smoking cigarettes, I began to exercise and found holistic herbs and used both to lose weight and became physically healthy.
- This year my resolve is to continue to take care of myself and strive to better take care of others. I will continue to be involved in my own emotional healthcare and will continue my education in order to better treat my clients.
- My plan is simple. Follow my heart, live well, do the next right thing, and stay happy.
What are your resolutions? Write them through the contact page and let me know.
Until next time,
Frank
E-Mail: frank@emoshuns.com
Toll-Free: (888) WANNA TALK
Web: www.emoshuns.com
Emoshuns.com - "Look Better, Feel Better, Take Back Your Life!"
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